I am not a morning person. Never have been and never will be. I hate both my innocent children and my husband before 10am. Before 7am I wish none of them were born.
Before 7am this morning, I heard myself saying the following seven sentences on repeat. I wondered what my life had come to as I walked around in my dressing gown wanting to kill them all.
- Stop pulling your brother’s diddle, he doesn’t like that.
- Big Truck. Wow. BRRRRRRRRMMMMMM.
- Don’t put the iPhone charger in the dryer please. No it’s not a necklace either, stop wrapping it around your neck.
- Ok fine, you can have the fly spray if you will just shut up. No, don’t lick it.
- Stop saying Bye Bye. We’re not going anywhere.
- Yes I know that’s a BALL. Thank you for the information.
- Where did you put your brother?
Everything’s ok now and I didn’t kill anyone. There’s always tomorrow morning.